As you already know, our man Mr. Smitty is one of many hidden talents. We’ve discussed, at length Mr. Smitty’s abilities as a shredder, enthusiast for B-list and character actors, and saver of leftovers. But if you forget, let’s review some of the man’s other talents.
Smitty’s a guy who likes to glad hand on both sides of the aisle. That’s why, when not ripping it up for the VBs, he moonlights as the bassist for ultra-conservative mouthpiece and dear friend to Sean Hannity: Ted Nugent.
Smitty knows so much about B-list actors because he himself has been one for many years. You may remember him from the popular film Toy Soldiers. Click on this photo to learn about Smitty’s other work.
If you’ve ever seen Smitherine throw up his arms for his middle-aged-white-man jump shot, you’ve seen just how good he is. Smitty was warming up for a gig the other day, like he always does, by playing a little ball, when a suit came down and said, “Get that kid a jersey!” He’s on the Houston Rockets now.
I bring all of this up because one of Smitty’s most deeply hidden talents was recently exposed, even to those of us who know him best. For the last twelve years, Greg Smith has been trading derivatives for Goldman Sachs, but now he’s finished. Tired of banksters and corporate greed, Smitty has eschewed the meatpacking plants, hookers, limousines, and all-you-can-eat buffets for a spot on the smelly backside of Ruby Pearl.
As Smitty says, “My proudest moments in life — getting a full scholarship to go from South Africa to Stanford University, being selected as a Rhodes Scholar national finalist, winning a bronze medal for table tennis at the Maccabiah Games in Israel, known as the Jewish Olympics — have all come through hard work, with no shortcuts. Goldman Sachs today has become too much about shortcuts and not enough about achievement. It just doesn’t feel right to me anymore.” Smitty’s back at Grease The Tub Productions full time again, where he’ll never rip you off and always play the lick that tickles your fancy. No shortcuts. Here’s to Good Guy Smitty!
